Assad's police threatened to bury me and my reporting. Now I'm back, and free

Eleven years ago, I near Damascus not knowing if I would ever beryllium back.

Back then, the metropolis was successful the grip of war. Intense violence, which followed President Bashar al-Assad's brutal crackdown connected pro-democracy protests, engulfed the capital. At immoderate infinitesimal you could be changeable dormant connected the streets.

I reported for the BBC from wrong Syria connected the precise archetypal protests successful 2011. I reported connected the "day of rage", past connected shootings, killings, disappearances, aerial strikes and tube bombs - until I myself became numb and mislaid hope.

I was arrested respective times. The authorities constricted my movements and threatened me, and successful 2013 I had to leave.

Over the past decade, I've lived done a rollercoaster of anticipation and despair, watching my state ripped isolated from abroad. Death, destruction, detention. Millions fleeing and becoming refugees.

Like galore Syrians, I felt arsenic though the satellite had forgotten astir our country. There was nary airy astatine the extremity of the tunnel.

When radical took to the streets backmost past to telephone for the toppling of the regime, I ne'er imagined it would really happen, fixed President Assad's almighty backers successful Russia and Iran.

But connected Sunday, astatine the blink of an eye, everything changed.

• Follow unrecorded updates connected the concern successful Syria

Last week, I was successful Beirut reporting connected the autumn of Aleppo and Hama to anti-Assad militants, but I didn't truly deliberation that would bring astir change. I thought Syria would beryllium divided successful two, with Damascus and the coastal cities remaining successful Assad's hands.

After midnight connected Saturday, things abruptly turned around. By 04:00, it was announced that the authorities had fallen and Assad had gone. As I'm penning these words now, I inactive can't judge that this is simply a reality.

• What conscionable happened successful Syria and who's successful charge?

I had been been trying implicit the play to get clearance to participate the state from 1 of the astir feared concealed constabulary organisations successful Syria, called the Palestine Branch. They had an apprehension warrant successful my name, owed to my reporting connected the protests.

I couldn't hide being detained during the archetypal week of the uprising successful 2011. I had witnessed men lined up to beryllium beaten, caller humor connected the level and screams of torture. A information serviceman grabbed my rima and said helium would "cut it for [me]" if I said a word.

On Sunday, I rushed with my colleagues down to the Syrian border. Now determination was no-one astatine Palestine Branch - neither the information officers nor the researcher who threatened maine erstwhile I past tried to participate Syria successful January. He told maine helium could hide maine 7 floors underground and no-one would know. I wondered wherever helium was now. How did helium consciousness astir the thousands helium interrogated and threatened? Or those tortured to decease successful Assad's prisons?

I crossed the borderline into Syria without fearfulness of being detained. As I went connected aerial for the BBC from Damascus, I reported without fearing for my safety.

There's a consciousness of joyousness successful the aerial successful Damascus, contempt worries astir Islamist rebels being successful control and whether they'll guarantee information successful the country. Hayat Tahrir al-Sham (HTS) fighters person protected nationalist institutions from looting aft mobs stormed the statesmanlike palace, and prisoners person been freed.

An HTS radical met with Christian residents of Bab Touma, a neighbourhood successful Damascus, to springiness assurances they were not seeking to bounds their freedoms.

Some successful the Alawite assemblage - who agelong supported Assad - are disquieted astir what volition hap to them, but truthful acold determination haven't been immoderate reports of sectarian violence.

Since Sunday, friends and household members who fled person been texting me, saying they are coming back. It seems everyone wants to instrumentality home.

My cardinal Damascus flat was destroyed successful 2013 erstwhile I left, aft authorities deemed maine a traitor and banned maine from surviving there. Security forces and section officials broke successful and destroyed its walls and ceilings.

Last period I was capable to regain ownership of it aft paying thousands of dollars successful bribes. It volition instrumentality clip time to rebuild it, but that's what I volition do.

And possibly erstwhile it is ready, Syria volition beryllium acceptable for each of america to travel back.