By Beth Rose
BBC Access All
Comedian Rosie Jones seems to beryllium everyplace these days from Casualty to QI. But arsenic she prepares to statesman her archetypal solo stand-up circuit she's besides battling against her ain feelings that she doesn't belong.
"I'm excited astir the tour," Rosie says, with conscionable a fewer days to go. "I'm a small spot scared, but I'm excited to spell retired and conscionable people."
At conscionable 32, Rosie seems to person achieved everything erstwhile it comes to "media" - acting successful long-running dramas, publishing respective children's books and penning for the Netflix hit, Sex Education.
She's besides fronted Trip Hazard, her ain question show, appeared connected Live At The Apollo and got each governmental connected Question Time (more connected that shortly), but she says radical are amazed to larn she hasn't toured before.
"I've truly lone been doing drama for six years, and 2 of those were wiped retired by a pandemic," she tells Access All, the BBC's play disablement and intelligence wellness podcast.
Her circuit - Triple Threat - volition analyse the thought of dealing with caller fame and whether she really deserves it, a taxable which sees creation mimic life.
Starting connected 3 March she has 35 afloat accessible venues booked with galore performances including British Sign Language (BSL) interpretation.
She knows she can't beryllium seen to driblet the shot connected this.
"I was perfectly determined to marque definite each country was accessible," she says, alert the disabled assemblage would beryllium peculiarly captious of her if she messed up.
"My accumulation institution had to ringing up each venue and accidental 'what tin you do?' And immoderate venue that said 'we can't bash that' they said 'Rosie won't go'."
Although she is excited astir her circuit she feels nervous. Being a cheery disabled woman, she explains, brings connected imposter syndrome.
LISTEN: You tin perceive much from Rosie connected the BBC Access All podcast.
And aft the authorities scrapped it's 10 Year Mental Health Plan, what happens next?
"I spell successful reasoning of the comedian stereotype which I grew up with which was male, non-disabled, straight, large and talking truly quickly.
"When you travel to spot me, you don't get fast-paced jokes but I warrant you laughter a lot."
Rosie has cerebral palsy. It affects her code and locomotion and she says she's "constantly warring internalised ableism".
Ableism is favoritism that favours non-disabled radical supra disabled people.
Internalised ableism, a operation we're proceeding a batch much of particularly connected societal media, is erstwhile a disabled idiosyncratic absorbs the favoritism they look and deliberation that mode astir themselves, too.
"Being a pistillate and being cheery means that each clip I'm connected TV I'll get a remark astir what I dependable like, my disability, my weight, my teeth, my hair. So each azygous level is simply a mode to maltreatment me.
"Because of that I'm successful therapy. I'm truly dealing with a batch of internalised ableism and things that I astir apt painted implicit with a joke," she says.
Trolling and ableism are connected her caput astatine the moment. As good arsenic preparing for her tour, she's filming a Channel 4 documentary astir society's attitudes towards disabled radical which is owed to beryllium aired successful May.
She says: "Every azygous time I get immoderate signifier of ableism online oregon successful existent beingness and I deliberation successful bid to eradicate that, successful bid to look the abusers I've got to travel present and spell 'you cognize what, it's not Ok'.
"We perfectly request to telephone ableism retired successful bid to eradicate it."
When Rosie appeared doubly connected BBC One's flagship statement show, Question Time, societal media lit up with earnestly unpleasant comments astir her which made headlines.
"Both times I started trending connected Twitter from each the maltreatment I was getting," she says.
"[They were saying] that I should beryllium successful a cage, I shouldn't beryllium connected TV, I should die."
Stars similar TV presenter and writer Richard Osmond, who himself is visually impaired, came retired successful enactment and it prompted a nationalist statement astir the mode nine viewed disability.
BBC newsman Alex Taylor summarised it astatine the clip saying: "Society is utilized to disablement being discussed, but not truthful overmuch disabled radical making their ain voices heard."
It has been 2 years since Rosie's past quality connected the precocious nighttime authorities amusement and she has had clip to reflect.
"I deliberation Question Time is superb but it attracts a batch of aggravated radical and not lone being female, disabled and cheery I americium also, surprise, surprise, highly Labour-leaning. So erstwhile I went onto that amusement and said 'here's what I think' a batch of right-wing radical didn't hold with maine and the casual happening to get maine for was my disability.
"Would I bash it again? Yes. But I would spell successful determination much prepared and I'd astir apt unopen my Twitter down for a fewer weeks."
The acquisition rocked her but she says speaking retired for what she believes successful is much important.
"I volition ever champion diversity, but it's hard and it's exhausting erstwhile I exposure myself to truthful overmuch abuse."
Despite that acquisition Rosie's vocation has continued to rise. Her bid of children's books astir The Amazing Edie Eckhart, who has cerebral palsy. person brought her legions of young fans and she is presently the go-to miss erstwhile it comes to booking a female, disabled comedian.
"Selfishly I similar that due to the fact that it's bought maine a beauteous house, " she jokes. "But I don't deliberation I'm taking jobs from different disabled people.
"We're still, unfortunately, astatine a signifier wherever they're getting either maine oregon different achromatic consecutive non-disabled person."
She says appearing connected arsenic galore antithetic shows arsenic imaginable mightiness "encourage much disabled radical to travel into the industry".
Her "ultimate dream" is to look connected a sheet amusement which conscionable happens to diagnostic respective different disabled comics astatine the aforesaid time.
It's thing she got adjacent to precocious erstwhile she fronted Rosie Jones's Disability Comedy Extravaganza - an online lawsuit showcasing 10 disabled up and coming comedians for UKTV Play and Dave TV's YouTube channel.
One of the comedians who performed was Dan Tiernan who talks astir being dyspraxic successful his stand-up routine. He has gone connected to triumph some the BBC New Comedy Award and British Comedian of the Year, demonstrating the spot and mainstream entreaty of the acts.
Rosie appreciates that with her precocious recovered success, she tin assistance to alteration the industry.
"I've got this platform, and it's astir however we bring up a load of superb disabled comics with me," she says.
As Rosie gets acceptable to caput to Birmingham for opening nighttime she acknowledges, "I'm truly arrogant of myself".
Just similar a rockstar, she has a non-negotiable rider that she expects to beryllium provided astatine each venue.
"This is the astir embarrassing thing. I privation I was a packet of fags and vessel of whiskey gal. But it's conscionable a spot of Yorkshire Tea."
You tin perceive to the podcast and find accusation and enactment connected the Access All page.