Sweet Bobby: Complex and cruel catfish scam that duped woman for nine years

It each started with a person request.

Kirat Assi thought she'd deed the jackpot erstwhile Bobby, a handsome cardiologist, got successful interaction with her successful 2009.

He wasn't a full stranger. The brace were some from westbound London's Sikh assemblage and had communal friends successful common.

So, Kirat accepted, and her online chats developed into deeper conversations earlier blossoming into a full-on emotion story.

The 2 became much and much entangled successful each other's lives but they ne'er met, adjacent aft years of correspondence.

Bobby would supply progressively outlandish excuses. He'd had a stroke. He'd been shot. He had entered witnesser protection.

The gangly tales, though, were ever backed up by idiosyncratic adjacent to Bobby - oregon truthful Kirat thought.

In truth, she was the unfortunate of a wildly elaborate and traumatising catfishing scheme.

After 9 years, erstwhile the excuses ran thin, Kirat yet came face-to-face with Bobby.

But she didn't recognise the idiosyncratic successful beforehand of her.

The idiosyncratic she'd been messaging was her pistillate cousin, Simran, who had been the brains down everything.

Looking backmost now, Kirat asks herself: "How could you person been truthful stupid?"

Kirat's shocking communicative was a deed for podcast shaper Tortoise successful 2021. You can perceive to that connected BBC Sounds here. Now, 3 years on, Netflix has precocious released a documentary which features her recounting her experience.

She says that telling her communicative has prompted others to inquire the aforesaid question: "How tin idiosyncratic autumn for that?"

It's besides prompted maltreatment from immoderate radical online.

"For radical who mightiness inactive deliberation I'm stupid. That's fine, you’re allowed your opinion," she tells BBC Asian Network News.

But Kirat says radical shouldn't marque assumptions - and countering these was partially what prompted her to archer her story.

"I'm not stupid, I'm not dumb. I'm the 1 that's chosen to speak.

"I'm the 1 that's enactment myself retired successful the firing enactment and I anticipation others volition travel forward," she says.

Which prompts different question: Why would idiosyncratic who'd been duped successful this mode enactment themselves successful the nationalist eye?

Kirat, who's from a Punjabi background, says speaking retired was important due to the fact that she wanted to situation stigmas successful the South Asian community.

"We are truthful frightened to unfastened up astir these issues," she says.

"Because of however a assemblage volition beryllium seen by wider society, the victims successful our communities support suffering."

Kirat says her dad's absorption to her communicative is simply a bully illustration of what she means.

"He doesn't privation to cognize what happened," she says.

"Because to look up to what happened, and however horrific it was, it's going to beryllium painful.

"I emotion my dada and I cognize my dada loves me," she says, adding: "It's a antithetic acceptable of values that helium has been brought up with."

Kirat says she hasn't spoken straight to "the existent Bobby" astir what happened, and puts this down to the community’s reluctance to person hard conversations.

She wonders if her acquisition would person been the aforesaid if she'd travel from different background.

"I'd beryllium making antithetic decisions," she says.

"Because we person responsibilities towards our community. You person the unit of family."

Despite immoderate antagonistic reactions to the re-tellings of Sweet Bobby, Kirat says she would alternatively woody with questions up-front.

"If you bash spot me, don't beryllium frightened to attack me," she says.

"And if you privation to accidental thing which mightiness beryllium arguable to me, it's OK.

"Let's person a treatment astir it," she says.

When Kirat's asked if speaking to podcast oregon documentary producers has fixed her a consciousness of closure, she's little certain.

Simran rejected offers to beryllium progressive successful the documentary, wherever she's played by an actress.

Kirat successfully brought civilian enactment against her cousin, receiving compensation and an apology astatine the extremity of the case.

A connection from Simran included successful the amusement says: "This substance involves events that began erstwhile she was a schoolgirl. She considers it a backstage substance and powerfully objects to what she describes arsenic galore unfounded and damaging accusations."

Kirat says Simran hasn't faced immoderate transgression charges, and wants her to beryllium held accountable.

"I'm not OK with that idiosyncratic being retired there," says Kirat.

There's different question that she's nary person to answering: Why?

Kirat doesn’t deliberation she volition ever genuinely find retired what drove the run against her.

"I deliberation I've agelong fixed up," she says.

"The grade to which that idiosyncratic went, you can't ever warrant it.

"I can't recognize wherefore you didn't stop… what gave you pleasance from proceeding idiosyncratic successful pain."

But not having answers is not stopping her from moving guardant with life, including dating again.

"I'm moving truly hard, harder than I should person to close present to rebuild my beingness and career," she says.

"I don't transportation the unfortunate mentality astir with me. I don't privation to beryllium that person.

"I'm going to transportation connected moving towards goals and dreams."