Doctors! Those guys are a menace to decent Americans.
They marque america pee successful insubstantial cups. They archer america to halt eating Mickey D’s super-sized fries for breakfast. They privation america to exercise. Sometimes they request to instrumentality our existent blood, the sick bastards.
Worst of all, they shove needles successful america and person the brass-faced, copper-bottomed gall to assertion it’s for our ain good.
But nary mas to the hellhole to the no! Our politician is fixing to hole this aesculapian mess. He’s going to get a Grand Jury to analyse what helium truthful rightly calls “crimes and wrongdoing” successful the vaccine concern complex.
Big Pharma, George Soros, and the Illuminati person brainwashed authorities doctors astatine the CDC, the FDA, the AMA, the JAMA, the NEJM and the remainder of those alleged “experts” pushing that mRNA vaccine connected the escaped citizens of Florida.
You don’t cognize what that worldly does to you. They’ve lone been moving connected it since 1988 and each sensible people, which is to accidental the radical Ron DeSantis talks to, cognize that you can’t beryllium 100 percent definite Bill Gates didn’t enactment a tracking spot successful there.
Or that those chemicals won’t marque you turn different head. Or rearrange your DNA to crook you into a Democrat.
And what if you go magnetic and instrumentality to your ain refrigerator door?
This is evidently a conspiracy. As the governor’s petition to the authorities Supreme Court says, it’s “impossible to ideate that truthful galore influential individuals came to this presumption connected their own.”
I mean, who are you going to believe, our politician (he went to Harvard Law!) and our surgeon general, Joe Ladapo (he went to aesculapian schoolhouse astatine Harvard!), oregon a clump of elitists who, OK, possibly a batch of them went to Harvard Medical, too, but the wide doc constitution brainwashed them into believing successful alleged “empirical data” which means they can’t admit the power of Satan erstwhile they spot it.
Thank God Gov. DeSantis is present to get to the bottommost of this alleged “pandemic.”
“Medical professionals” assertion the unvaccinated were 9 times much apt to die than the vaccinated. “Journalists” constituent retired that successful 2021 our politician said, “These vaccines are redeeming lives” and if you get one, “the accidental of you getting earnestly sick oregon dying from COVID is efficaciously zero.”
But the politician lone said that worldly due to the fact that the America-hating “Dr.” Anthony Fauci (you cognize helium believes successful evolution) lied, telling citizens that taking a needle afloat of Pfizer would support them from the virus.
Also possibly due to the fact that the politician needs to get much anti-science MAGA voters successful 2024.
(And what’s incorrect with that?)
Clearly, “Dr.” Anthony Fauci needs to beryllium investigated. He pooh-poohed the president’s fantabulous thought of drinking disinfectant. He forced Americans to deterioration masks, denying them their constitutionally protected close to facial freedom.
Has anyone checked to spot if Fauci is an cause of the Chinese? He definite talks similar a communist.
In a caller interview, helium said, “We’re all successful this together. We’re each quality beings and we’re each susceptible to illness that tin termination us.”
Not successful Florida. It can’t termination us. We are excessively escaped to die. And we don’t judge successful being “all successful this together.” That’s socialism. If we’re successful anything, it’s individually.
Wuhan Tony tin archer america till he’s bluish successful the look that immoderate survey by the Commonwealth Fund (clearly a collectivist cell) shows that COVID-19 vaccines made by Pfizer, Moderna, and Johnson & Johnson saved implicit 3.2 cardinal American lives and kept 18.5 cardinal retired of the infirmary during 2020 and 2021.
Here successful Florida, we don’t judge these gross untruths. Those pictures of aged radical connected ventilators? Crisis actors.
Do your ain research.
Dr. Joe Ladapo volition instrumentality attraction of us. Just a mates of months agone helium published his ain survey which says that guys 18-39 shouldn’t get vaxxed due to the fact that they could person a bosom onslaught and die.
Of course, snobs astatine the Institute for Vaccine Safety astatine Johns Hopkins and the American Academy of Pediatrics accidental that Dr. Ladapo’s study isn’t valid due to the fact that it relies connected a precise tiny sample, has a flawed methodology, nary named authors, and nary adjacent review. One of these snooty MDs adjacent said immoderate aesculapian diary would cull it “unless you were paying them to people it.”
Well, what’s incorrect with making a small money, huh?
It doesn’t substance anyway. Florida does things the Florida way, which means Ron DeSantis’ way. The champion way.
Plus, Dr. Ladapo is simply a genius and the governor’s putting him successful complaint of a caller Public Health Review Committee to instrumentality a long, hard look astatine the DC snake lipid forced down our gullets by aesculapian dictators.
No longer volition a clump of geeks with fancy degrees beryllium successful complaint of our well-being. Floridians volition beryllium liberated from busybody subject and allowed to judge immoderate we want, ne'er caput “facts,” ne'er caput loser “physicians” who get their jollies poking things into your soma and looking astatine your bare x-rays.
Dr. Ladapo and his ace squad of Public Health gurus volition excavation heavy into the cardinal aesculapian topics of our time, including:
*Penicillin–will it marque you spell moldy nary substance what the CDC says?
*Who died and made the CDC God, anyway?
*How eating tons of fruit–lots and tons of fruit–can assistance you ward disconnected everything from COVID-19 to bunions to breached arms.
*Are astir diseases caused by demonic possession? How the Deep State refuses to archer the information astir the minions of Hell and the ways they infiltrate america done fluoridated water.
*Why not springiness exorcists aesculapian licenses? They’re professionals, too.
*Little children are forced to get repeatedly jabbed with needles containing chemicals earlier they are allowed to spell to school. This is sick and weird. Perhaps we should conscionable marque children devour 2 pounds of bananas each day.
Floridians person our ain knowing of “health.” After all, we unrecorded successful a precise peculiar place.
Our life-giving h2o isn’t simply blue: sometimes it comes successful an charismatic shadiness of avocado green.
You don’t person to hook food to payment from eating those beneficial food oils; successful Florida they lavation up connected the formation for you to scoop up, already dead!
Vitamin D? We’ve got each you request and more, nary costly pills. Just prevarication astir extracurricular for a fewer hours. You’ll spot that tegument commencement to crinkle and crook red. You’re done!
Plus, our authorities has galore opportunities for exercise, including sprint swimming, champion done successful alligator-rich ponds, oregon rowing down flooded streets, and riding connected cute carts crossed highly fertilized lawns successful pursuit of a tiny ball.
See? We don’t request radical with achromatic coats and stethoscopes.
The lone doctors Florida needs are Dr. Phil, Dr. Oz, Dr. Laura, and Dr. Feelgood.
Diane Roberts is an 8th-generation Floridian, calved and bred successful Tallahassee. Educated astatine Florida State University and Oxford University successful England, she has been penning for newspapers since 1983, erstwhile she began producing columns connected the legislature for the Florida Flambeau. Her enactment has appeared successful the New York Times, the Times of London, the Guardian, the Washington Post, the Oxford American, and Flamingo. She has been a subordinate of the Editorial Board of the St. Petersburg Times–back erstwhile that was the Tampa Bay Times’s name–and a long-time columnist for the insubstantial successful some its iterations. She was a commentator connected NPR for 22 years and continues to lend vigor essays and sentiment pieces to the BBC. Roberts is besides the writer of 4 books.