'They allow us to name something we know is wrong': The new words defining sexual abuse

This nonfiction contains descriptions of intersexual violence.

In Italian, "mano morta" means "dead hand". It is discussed betwixt mothers and daughters, groups of friends kick astir it successful their chats, and teenage girls are warned to beryllium vigilant arsenic they marque their mode to school.

But the dormant manus is not spooky folklore. It is simply a signifier of intersexual battle astir commonly performed against women - it describes the lingering manus countless women person encountered resting against intimate parts of their assemblage connected a packed autobus oregon train.

Among Italians, "mano morta" accurately pinpoints this intentional behaviour. Women astir the satellite whitethorn person besides experienced the aforesaid signifier of assault, but mightiness not person a connection successful their connection to sanction it.

In English, "gaslighting", "upskirting" and "love bombing" are progressively being utilized to picture forms of abuse.

Gaslighting - the enactment oregon signifier of grossly misleading someone, particularly for one's ain vantage - was named Merriam-Webster dictionary's connection of 2022, with a 1,740% summation successful hunt connected their tract this year. On TikTok, #gaslighting has 1.9 cardinal views, and #lovebombing astir 250 million.

"If we look astatine erstwhile these words got into the connection to picture the acquisition of women successful presumption of intersexual unit oregon different forms of sexism, it was erstwhile feminism became a large societal movement," says Dr Alessia Tranchese, who researches however unit against women tin beryllium perpetuated done language.

A elder lecturer successful connection and applied linguistics astatine the University of Portsmouth, Dr Tranchese studies however caller words coined to picture existing forms of maltreatment are a means to situation sex violence.

"We could accidental that connection some reflects the unequal relationships betwixt men and women, and is simply a spot wherever these relationships tin beryllium enacted and recreated," she adds.

But tin the instauration of caller presumption truly assistance tackle abuses faced by women astir the world?

BBC 100 Women speaks to 3 women who person been spreading the connection - virtually - astir caller expressions to picture intersexual battle and harassment - from the UK, to South America and the Middle East.

When Michaela Coel's I May Destroy You deed tv screens successful 2020, it was an contiguous occurrence among critics.

But the award-winning British series, which charts 1 woman's travel pursuing her intersexual assault, had ramifications beyond the satellite of TV critics - making waves successful the existent satellite 12,000 miles away.

Maite Orsini, a 34-year-old Chilean person and subordinate of parliament, was shocked by 1 peculiar scene, successful which protagonist Arabella learns a antheral removed the condom without her consent during a intersexual encounter. She aboriginal discovered non-consensual condom removal, oregon stealthing, is classified arsenic rape successful the UK, Germany, Canada and the authorities of California, successful the US.

"I had not go alert that this was so intersexual assault, and I deliberation that erstwhile I saw it depicted successful the bid I understood it," says Ms Orsini, a lawyer by assemblage with a master's grade successful nationalist safety.

Since stealthing wasn't considered a transgression successful Chile, determination were nary authoritative statistic connected the fig of cases. But arsenic Ms Orsini spoke to much friends, acquaintances and colleagues, it became wide this was an contented that transcended borders - and victims had nary ineligible protections to assistance them.

She decided stealthing needed to beryllium enactment into achromatic and achromatic successful Chilean law, and began to draught a bill.

"We had a agelong statement astir uncovering a connection successful Spanish to sanction stealthing, but I refused to bash that. I wanted those who had been a unfortunate to beryllium capable to recognise that the conception is being utilized retired determination [in English], and they could spell connected the net and find accusation if they needed it."

Her stealthing measure swept done the Lower House of the Chilean Parliament successful January, and has present moved to the Senate. Ms Orsini's measure would marque stealthing a transgression - a punishable signifier of intersexual assault.

This could beryllium seen arsenic a displacement successful however women are reclaiming powerfulness implicit language, says Dr Tranchese.

"If you deliberation astir things similar dictionaries, who makes dictionaries? Historically, it's been men.

"Women were not allowed to beryllium writers oregon lawyers oregon doctors. The knowledge, the meaning-making process, was a prerogative of men."

Ms Orsini agrees connected the pivotal relation connection tin play for women who person been done abuse.

"I deliberation that naming behaviours that person not been antecedently named whitethorn pb to victims being capable to recognise themselves arsenic victims," she says.

"I wanted stealthing to beryllium successful the penal code, to make consciousness that this transgression exists, truthful that women and girls cognize that erstwhile they are victims of this benignant of behaviour, it is sanctioned successful our legislation, and they tin truthful study it."

Language is besides being utilized to seizure however women consciousness progressively unsafe successful nationalist spaces, according to 1 Northern Ireland politician.

A caller intersexual offences bill, projected by erstwhile Justice Minister Naomi Long, made its mode into instrumentality successful Northern Ireland successful March.

It featured a fig of caller terms, including "downblousing"- coined to picture the enactment of taking photos down a person's apical without consent.

"It's a precise peculiar benignant of harassment," says Ms Long. "It's an effort to humiliate and degrade women and origin fear."

Previously, the transgression was not specifically mentioned successful law, making it hard for some victims and constabulary to recognize what could beryllium done, Ms Long says.

"It tin beryllium precise distressing erstwhile you cognize that you person experienced a usurpation of your privacy, and it causes anxiousness and humiliation, but you spell to the constabulary and they're not definite that's a crime."

Language itself, and the gendered connotations of the connection "downblousing", were portion of the discussion, says Ms Long.

"There was immoderate treatment astir whether it should beryllium blouse oregon garment oregon top, determination was a spot of treatment arsenic to whether determination would beryllium references to breasts oregon chest.

"I felt it was important that we recognise that radical are not going astir trying to instrumentality photos down men's shirts. It's conscionable not happening, it's not a thing."

"Language does matter. How we picture these things matters," says Ms Long. "It volition let nine to springiness a sanction to thing that they cognize is wrong, but person often struggled to articulate why."

Prof Lera Boroditsky's occupation is to probe however humans "get truthful smart" and a precise important portion of that reply is language, she says.

"Languages are these surviving things that we're capable to alteration to suit our needs. Reality poses tons of fascinating questions astir however the languages we talk signifier the mode we think, and besides however we tin effort to alteration the mode we talk successful bid to alteration the mode radical astir america think," she says.

The cognitive idiosyncratic examines the narration betwixt our minds, connection and reality, and successful peculiar however we make meaning successful society.

"How you picture an lawsuit oregon an mishap tin dramatically alteration however we blasted and punish the radical involved," she says.

When we see the interaction of a sanction oregon connection fixed to a peculiar concept, it's besides important to see its specificity, Prof Boroditsky says.

"For example, it utilized to beryllium that intersexual battle victims mightiness beryllium asked successful court, 'And is that erstwhile helium kissed you?' Kissing is this truly bully happening for astir people, but not erstwhile it's forced oral interaction with a stranger. So if you telephone it 'forced oral contact' instead, that creates a precise antithetic representation successful the caput of the assemblage - that specificity creates a antithetic affectional effect than a connection that is much acquainted oregon generic."

On a regular basis, Lamya Lofty witnesses the abuses faced by women successful Egypt - including often unreported cases of marital rape.

"And the occupation is that women themselves whitethorn not realise this is simply a convulsive enactment against them," she says.

Head of programmes astatine the New Women Foundation, Ms Lofty attends mediation sessions and provides harmless shelters for abused women.

A 2018 study by the World Health Organisation (WHO) showed that successful Egypt 30% of ever-married oregon partnered women aged 15 to 49 acquisition carnal oregon intersexual intimate spouse unit successful their lifetime.

Most victims of marital rape bash not adjacent place it arsenic such. "So who volition they kick to, and astir what?" she asks.

Men convicted of rape successful Egypt tin look beingness imprisonment oregon adjacent the decease punishment - yet marital rape does not look successful the country's penal code.

Ms Lofty's organisation has helped to draught a measure which specifically names marital rape. It is the 2nd clip the connection has been submitted to parliament - and she is patiently waiting for it to beryllium discussed connected the floor.

"Rape is rejected and punished successful society, and this is wherefore determination is absorption to usage the word erstwhile it comes to marital relationships: erstwhile you statement it 'marital rape', determination is an contiguous condemnation of the man. They are trying to alienate the word itself from men," Ms Lofty says.

Limitations successful connection spell beyond policymaking and permeate mundane conversations, she argues.

The operation "aghtesab zawgy", which translates arsenic "marital rape", started to beryllium utilized by Egyptian quality rights campaigners successful the 80s, but remained confined to a minority, she says.

Slowly, things are starting to change. She credits the 2020 TV bid Newton's Game, which features a country wherever a pistillate is raped by her husband.

"This was the infinitesimal I noticed women saying to me, 'This happens to us.' Some started to adjacent usage the word 'aghtesab zawgy'. Some said to me, 'So if we accidental this is happening to us, they volition instrumentality america seriously?' But earlier that, it was hushed up oregon ignored, arsenic if it didn't exist."

Linguist Dr Alessia Tranchese points to the bonding relation of language, that tin assistance make a consciousness of assemblage by means of identification.

"I deliberation having these words has fixed women the quality to spot that their experiences are not isolated - 'This is thing that helium did to maine once' - but portion of a larger systemic contented that affects tons of women," she says.

"Naming makes it much evident that it's a shared experience."

Additional reporting and accumulation by Inma Gil, Valeria Perasso and Sara Abou Bakr. Main illustration by Ghazal Farkhari @rasmorwaj

BBC 100 Women names 100 inspiring and influential women astir the satellite each year. Follow BBC 100 Women connected Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. Join the speech utilizing #BBC100Women.