Tim Dowling: my band is making a video, and guess who plays the deluded loser?



For 1 country I person to look forlornly astatine a machine display. This person to beryllium casual – it’s what I bash for a dwelling

Illustration: Guardian Des/Getty Images Illustration: Guardian Des/Getty ImagesTim Dowling@IAmTimDowlingSat 22 Oct 2022 01.00 EDTLast modified connected Sat 22 Oct 2022 16.Forty 4 EDT

Two years successful the past the set I’m successful recorded a foundation Christmas single, and I had an thought for a video. What started with maine emailing a pugnacious specify ended with maine sitting connected a lavatory dressed arsenic Santa adjacent arsenic young humans filmed me. After that time I embarked connected a play of keeping my thoughts to myself.

At the opening of closing yr the set released an album, and adjacent though I had immoderate different conception for a video, I didn’t accidental immoderate for a agelong time. Eventually, however, I became persuaded to springiness an mentation for the conception to a manager known arsenic Martin implicit lunch.

“It’s fundamentally astir this deluded loser,” I stated, waving a fork, “residing successful a bittersweet level and dreaming of get away.”

Months later, this communique yields predictable results.

“Someday this set is gonna marque a video successful which I don’t instrumentality a spot connected a bathroom,” I say, sitting connected a remainder room. Young humans are shining lights connected me.

“It’s signifier of a sature constituent for you currently, isn’t it?” says Martin, from down the integer camera.

“I guess,” I say.

“Let’s spell erstwhile more,” helium says.

When you're making a movie astir a deluded loser dwelling successful a soulless flat, securing a spot calls for tact. You can’t conscionable locomotion into a person’s surviving country and say, “This is ideal!” It took immoderate diplomacy to invitation the bass subordinate for support to person his honestly precise fantabulous level utilizing dim lighting fixtures, unflattering angles and set-dressing.

When it came to casting the deluded loser, but, nary specified delicacy became concerned.

“It’s were fixed to beryllium you,” Martin tells me.

“Really?” I say. “I had, I don’t recognize, a younger loser successful mind.”

“No,” helium says. “Definitely you.”

My reluctance to play the portion has not thing to bash with my age, oregon the anticipation that I’m important casting’s thought of a loser. It’s due to the fact that I can’t act.

When I accidental I can’t act, I bash nary longer suggest that I find it hard to inhabit a idiosyncratic fully, oregon that I struggle to summon genuine feelings connected cue. I mean that I americium incapable of pursuing elemental commands astatine the aforesaid clip arsenic a digicam is skilled connected me. I observe this achy to admit, due to the fact that determination was a clip successful my beingness while, having finished nary acting, I thought I would perchance secretly beryllium desirable astatine it.

The elemental series of movements appears monstrously complex. On establishing the refrigerator I observe myself pretending to hunt for the carton, though it’s the handiest origin successful there

On the nighttime earlier than the video shoot, my woman talks astir going to adjacent a movie.

“I can’t bash the pursuing day,” I say. “I adjacent person this video thing.”

“From portion to when?” she says.

“I request to beryllium determination each day,” I say, “due to the information I’m fundamentally the celebrated idiosyncratic of it.”

“How did that amusement up?” she says.

“The manager feels I really person definite characteristics,” I say.

“Does helium recognise you could’t act?” she says.

On my mode to the shoot, I determine it is important to beryllium upfront with Martin, who's a professional.

“The constituent is, I can’t act,” I archer him.

“You’ll beryllium pleasant,” helium says. “It’s present not The Iceman Cometh.”

He rapidly unearths retired what I’m speaking approximately, arsenic helium directs a 3rd instrumentality of maine establishing a fridge, casting disconnected a carton, and filling a pitcher from it. There is simply a integer camera implicit my due shoulder, and each different 1 wrong the fridge, making the appearing doubly hard.

“And cut,” says Martin.

“How turned into that?” I say.

“That was proper,” helium says. “Maybe a chunk faster adjacent time.”

“Faster,” I say. “Got it.”

But the elemental bid of actions seems monstrously complex. On opening the fridge I observe myself pretending to look for the carton, adjacent though it’s the simplest facet successful there. I think: your antheral oregon pistillate could by nary means bash that. Focus!

“Cut,” says Martin.

“I spilled a few,” I say.

“Try nary longer filling it rather truthful full,” helium says.

After 8 other takes we improvement to the adjacent scene, which requires maine to beryllium and look forlornly astatine a machine display. This person to beryllium creaseless – it’s what I bash for a dwelling – nevertheless Martin has thoughts.

“Maybe instrumentality a sip from the glass,” helium says.

“What, astatine the aforesaid time?” I say.

By the clip the remainder of the set crook arsenic overmuch arsenic alteration into their matador costumes, the prima is already placing. I americium exhausted.

“How’s helium been doing?” the guitar subordinate asks Martin, pointing astatine me. Martin pauses, arsenic though composing a diplomatic response.

“He takes it beauteous seriously,” helium says.

Weeks aboriginal whilst the video is completed, I ticker myself instrumentality the carton from the refrigerator galore instances. It’s highly bully however hard I marque it look.